Can you connect the dots?

This post is all over the place & if you stick with it trying to connect the dots your retina's will probably bleed. Good Luck!

Hurdles are much easier to get over when running around a track. In other areas of life they make things messy.

Pregnant - at 18 - after only four short months of marriage - MESSY

Depl*yment - 8 months into our marriage - 4 months into a pregnancy - a world apart for a whole year - raising a baby alone like a single Mom for 8 months - MESSY

Emergency Leave - a loved one given a 3 month life expectancy - MESSY

Moving - a new city - downsizing from a 3 bedroom house to a 2 bedroom apartment - new church - balancing full time college and work - no family nearby - MESSY

Surrender - knowing God wants you to put aside your dreams and goals to pursue His will - dropping out of college - facing opposition from those who love you - MESSY

Death - loosing someone you love - knowing your kids will be unable to remember Granddaddy's love - wills - lawyers - family fractions - MESSY

Moving Again - leaving newly formed friendships - giving up an area of ministry that might be the wrong choice - not knowing for sure if you're doing the right thing - MESSY

No Job - Wondering how to pay the bills and feed the kids when you're supposed to be Christmas shopping - MESSY

Ministry Troubles - deciphering the difference between serving Jesus & pleasing people - standing up or backing down - fear of failure - faith under fire - trust issues - MESSY

Tragedy - More loved ones gone - unsure of their eternal destination - children grieving loss of two more grandparents - Hubby orphaned - funerals -caskets - lawyers - MESSY

Finances - income cut in 1/2 - minimal room to minimize bills - bill collectors - food stamps - trying not to worry - MESSY

A series of hurdles. Each one messy but each one valuable. Lessons are learned. Priorities are made and re-arranged. Faith is stretched and grown.

I'm a dreamer. Ideas pop into my head all the time. Most people think I'm crazy most of the time and it drives me nutso. Why can't people see that with a little effort { and a whopping dose of divine intervention } dreams can come true? I've always had a dream of having a BUNCH of kids. Most people think I"m psycho when they hear this but my dream come true would be to have a huge house centered around an indoor sound-proof play area { like the ones at Ch*ck-fil-a } and two corridors of bedrooms. One for boys and another for girls, both filled to overflowing with bunk beds. I know most of you are thinking "wake-up thats a nightmare" but it really is my dream!

I have two children but I want more. I love pregnancy but told God I felt guilty about being pregnant when their are millions of orphaned children already here on earth desperate for someone to love them. I told God after many tears and a few sobbed prayers if it was His will I would accept it. Two years without B.C. { did you know it kills babies?} and still no pregnancy... my firstborn was conceived on B.C. { praise Jesus } after only four months. With the green light to pursue adoption from my Hubby we were approved by an agency to pursue adoption of a little boy from P*land but roller coaster finances over the past two years have kept anything from happening.

I love yard sales.

I love Surviv*r. We watch it every season. { For the record if you don't know what Surviv*r is you totally won't get this. } This season there is this oil-tycoon billionaire playing to show the world how easy it really is. He went looking for the immunity idol before getting a clue and found it! He thinks ahead, he doesn't wait to be told what to do, he is a billionaire because he gets things done. I think he is there to teach me a lesson.

I have a desire to adopt from Afr*ca specifically because of a funny conversation I had with my late mother-in-law.

I absolutely adore my life. I have an amazing husband, two beautiful children, a comfortable home, and despite our current financial storm we seriously want for NOTHING. We are SO blessed I can NOT stress it enough! We've had amazing opportunities and a very comfortable very wonderful life. We CAN NOT complain. We do NOT deserve all that we have been given. Not even a fraction! Despite this I have a restless soul, I just know we are yet to discover exactly what God wants for our lives. I have been discouraged big time not knowing for sure where I am supposed to be. Where are family is supposed to be. All I know is that this isn't quite it.

Hurdles. Dreams. Adoption.Yard Sales. Survivor Oil-Tycoon. Afr*can Babies

Does God play connect the dots?

Our church had a yard sale a couple weeks ago. I loaded up a bunch of junk & tried to make a couple dollars. After it was all over I helped take the unsold treasures to a local thrift store that funds a ministry from our area that builds, funds, & runs churches, schools, & a children's home in Ug*nda Afr*ca with local donations. They were swamped with donations so I offered to help sort through things. One day led to another and now I can hardly imagine not going and helping out there. I don't know why I felt so drawn there. Working beside people I barely knew I felt at home. I belonged. Not sure why, but being there, sorting, stacking, helping... it was peaceful... it was joyful. For the first time in a long time I really felt peace and joy. I think this is how it feels to be in the center of God's will. To be exactly where He wants me. I like it. I don't want to move from this place!

If God works out the details my hubby and I will get on a plane and go to Afr*ca for three weeks to see if maybe, just maybe, God is starting to connect the dots.

Pray for us.
We need wisdom.
We need God's intervention. {That is one serious God-sized if we have to tackle!}

If it's His will it will happen. No doubt.