Certainly Not Me!

I did not let my kids steal countless M&M's out of our candy jar while chatting online to my cuz because I was to into the conversation and to lazy to get up and do something about it. I most certainly did not turn a deaf ear and allow them to think they were being sneaky.

I did not let my children use a mattress as a trampoline this week so that they could expend some of their energy and be tired enough to actually take a nap. How irresponsible would that have been?!?

I did not stay up well past midnight ... think 2 a.m. people... Sunday morning reading blogs sticking my nose into everyone else's business, completely procrastinating finishing the bulletin that needed to be written, printed, copied 150 times, and then folded all in time for Sunday School.  That definitely would have been irresponsible! If that had happened, and it most certainly did not, as a result I most definitely did not finally crawl into bed at 4:07 a.m., start hitting the snooze alarm at 5:00 a.m.. I most certainly was not dragged to the shower by my hubby. I most certainly would not have been caught snoring standing up in the shower. I most assuredly did not down enough caffeine to keep an elephant wired for days in order to become functionalbarely able to get my 2 and 4 year olds dressed and out the door bibles in hand. No matter what you've heard I most definitely did not arrive at church, and after looking at the bulletin realize I needed to get to a computer FAST, update the prayer request/sympathy/hospital section, re-print/copy/fold 150 bulletins. All before during Sunday School. Geesh, I'm so glad I am more responsible than THAT!

I did not have a hard time staying awake during children's church Sunday morning. I mean come on, who has trouble staying awake during church when you are surrounded by kids and you have to get up and dance to a worship song every 7-8 minutes?!?!?! Geesh, that type of person would need a good stern talkin' to about preparing for the sabbath with a proper nights rest.

I most certainly am not trying to figure out how to save $400,000 dollars to buy a church camp lodge to turn into a children's home for foster children. Who in their right mind would dream of wanting a house big enough to have over 20 foster kids...all at once. That... my friends... is insanity, and I am most definitely not insane!

I am not seriously considering contacting chick-fil-a to see if they would let me advertise for them through said children's home by putting in an awesome soundproof indoor play area. I mean come on, who would be thinking about a soundproof play area when they can't even afford but 1/4 of the place to begin with?

I did not stay up until 2 a.m. on Sunday night after getting next to zero sleep the night before doing you know what again.


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